‘Millions Voted Illegally’ – Poll Shock Threatens Democracy And Sequin Sales

US President-elect Donald Trump has claimed that the result of this year’s poll would have been different ‘if you deduct the millions of people who voted illegally‘.

In a series of incendiary Tweets, Mr Trump claimed that the polls in Virginia, New Hampshire and California had been skewed by millions of illegal votes cast in favour of Ed Balls.

Mr Balls had managed to survive the Strictly Come Dancing public vote for three months despite being universally reviled and carrying the handicap of being a rhythmically challenged tub of lard.

ed-balls
Corpulent poll cheat Ed Balls and his glamorous partner attempt an ill-advised al fresco Paso Doble yesterday. ‘Significant’ structural damage to neighbouring buildings reported

Mr Trump’s claims have no basis in fact, obviously; Mr Trump’s claims never do. But still, it makes you think, doesn’t it?

And while we’re at it: how come Ed Balls spent three months cha-cha-bloody-cha-ing while sweating like a hormonal sow in a jacuzzi and yet actually managed to put on weight?

It’s got to be the Russians.

Possibly Corbyn…

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s